In my own family functions, I could never sit as the 'collector' of gifts. After all, I had to be busy organizing the function. But in many of my wife's side functions, I was one of the designated persons to do the honors. There was one particular nephew who would be my main assistant and a niece to do the odd jobs. Somehow, my wife's relatives found me trustworthy, which many others didn't.

Having accepted such important duties, I was meticulous. Each gift would be numbered except, of course, for cash, and when the package was opened, it would be easy to write what exactly the gift item was against that unique number. I had one very interesting event during one such function. An elderly aunt from my wife's side, not exactly known for benevolence or large-heartedness, gave me Rs. X and requested me to note down that amount as Rs. 2X! I just nodded to avoid argument. Was I not supposed to account for the total cash?

I have done this duty for a couple of my friends' weddings. Generally, only a close relative is asked to do this task, and conversely, people think whoever sits for this is a person close to the family. Hence, once doing this onerous task for a friend, the priests started pestering me to recommend payment of an additional amount to them. With great difficulty, I escaped.

Another incident: after I had undertaken this job for a friend, I neatly packed up the things and arranged the cash and handed them over to my friend's mom. As she was about to take out some money from the bundle, I shouted, "Wait, wait." She was bemused and asked me, "Is it not our money? Why are you preventing me from opening the bundle?" I said, "Just ensure the amount matches the receipts, and then take it out, please." I wanted to be in the clear.

In the same incident, I had recycled a gift received by me and given it to my friend. It was brand new, though. But his mom found out and asked me bluntly, though not out of sarcasm or insult, just for fun, whether I had recycled. You should have seen my face.

Continued in 282 - Cookies in The Hall - Part 1